PETER’S HUMOR? C.A.S.H. apologizes if you are not amused

We’d like to thank Lily Wolf for helping to find, adapt and invent some great stuff here.

Fast forward to 2050 when humans have resorted to cannibalism.  Harry goes to the supermarket for some brains and looks in the display case

and sees:

– teacher brains $36/lb.,

– dress designer brains $42/lb.,

– lawyer brains $65/lb.,

– hunter brains $129/lb.

Harry asks, “Can you tell me why hunter brains are so expensive?”  The clerk answered, “Do you know how many hunter brains it takes to make a pound?”

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A couple walked into a diner, leading an alligator by a leash. The woman asked the host, “Do you have vegan options?” He assured her that there were many vegan options on the menu. The man then asked him, very apologetically, “Do you serve hunters here?”

“Sure do,” said the host. “Great,” replied the man. “Give me a veggie-burger, and a hunter for my ‘gator.”

Pete’s Humor archives

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On the first day of hunting season, a hunter is sitting in a deer blind when he falls off and breaks both his legs. At the doctor’s, he moans, “Why couldn’t this have happened on my last day of hunting?” to which the doctor replies, “It did.”

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He’s not breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911.

“I think my friend is dead!” he yells. “What can I do?”

The operator says, “Calm down. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”

There’s a silence, then a shot. Back on the phone, the guy says, “OK, now what?”

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Q: Did you hear about the hunter who locked his keys in his car?
A: Yup, and he had to use a coat hanger to get his hunting buddies out.

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Committee to Abolish Sport Hunting / C.A.S.H.
P.O. Box 562
New Paltz, NY 12561
845/256-1400